Do you want to do what’s right for you, not what everyone else wants you to do? Do you want to be able to trust your gut? Do you have a choice you want help making?
This post by Lindsey Lewis of libreliving.com on how to be your own guide for life will walk you through it, step by step:
Here are 8 Ways to Be Your Own Guide for Life
1. Move away from making other people’s ideals your priority. We get caught up in thinking that what “everyone else” tells us is important is actually important—even if it doesn’t feel right for us or in alignment with who we are. Moving away from making other people’s ideals your priority means realizing that you’re just as wise as everybody else.
Move away from making other people’s ideals your priority. — @Lindsey_Lewis
2. Listen deeper. Your social self is the part of you that works well in teams and knows how to work well with and cooperate with other people. It’s also the part us that can get caught up in thinking things like “If I do this, how will people respond?” or “If I don’t do that, how will people respond?” And when we think more about these things rather than about what’s true and right for us, we’re not guiding ourselves. Listening deeper, to what you truly desire, taps you into your essential self, the person you truly are, your tastes and talents.
3. Figure out what you truly desire. More people than I can count have said to me “But I don’t know what I truly want.” If this is you, don’t worry, you can figure that out. Just start to pay attention to how you feel in different situations: a peaceful contentment is often a flashing sign that you’re doing something you truly desire that’s in alignment with your essential self.
4. Stop letting your social self run your show. When it comes to listening to your essential self, it comes down to listening to your body. Here’s why: The verbal part of your brain—the part of your brain that communicates to you through thought—processes about 40 bits of information per second. The non-verbal part of your brain—the part of your brain that communicates to you through physical sensation—processes between 8 to 11 million bits of information per second. Basically, when it comes to wanting to listen to the part of you that knows more, it’s smarter to listen to what your body is telling you.
5. If you can’t seem to quiet your social self so you can listen to your body...bring in the power of Byron Katie. She’s a wonder woman-spiritual teacher who asks a question she says only has three answers to choose from: your business, their business, or God’s business. The question is this: Whose business is it? And the answer to any question about whose business other people judging you? Always: that’s their business.
6. Your body knows best. And your essential self communicates to you through physical sensation: a “yes” from your essential self usually feels more like freedom, relief, sighs of contentment. A “no” from your essential self usually feels more like constriction and tension, feeling stuck.
Your essential self communicates to you through physical sensation — @Lindsey_Lewis
7. Believe. Sometimes the verbal part of our brain needs a little help believing what our essential self already knows to be true. So once you’ve figured out what you want to do, think up three people who’ve done it, or something very similar. The verbal part of your brain needs evidence in order to understand what’s possible, so you can help it out by doing this. And then it’ll help you out by supporting you with more helpful thoughts.
8. Play. The best way to start using these concepts in your own life is to just play with them. Hold them lightly and look at them the way a child would look at a new toy—with a sense of joyful anticipation and curiosity. And then use them in just that way, just seeing what happens as you try things out.
I can tell you so many stories of things people have received as a result of living as their own guide for life, things that seem to have just fallen in their lap, just as they dreamed of: dream apartments, moves to exotic locations, even dream jobs.
That’s because when we live as our own guide for life we also live out our purpose, our passion and our destiny—and all of life conspires to come together to support us.
When we live as our own guide for life we also live out our purpose — @Lindsey_Lewis
So good luck and much love,
For more on how to be your own guide for life, visit http://libreliving.com/coaching-with-lindsey-karent-trepte/